Cell Phones: Good & Bad

Let's face it, cell phones are now a prevalent part of our lives and if they aren't, then you are either a) lucky or b) a sad loser. Let us map out why.

LOSER: these are some things you miss out on by not having a phone.

1) cell phones are so handy. i live in new york. new york is a freaking huge city. i am bound to be get lost on numerous occasions (which i have). If i didn't have a phone i could either ask someone around me where something was (which i do, actually, and is helpful, so maybe this is bad for my argument) or you can find a dirty payphone with syphilis on it. Asking people is good and helpful sometimes but you run the risk of a) asking a crazy homeless person and therefore run the risk of losing your life, or b) you get to witness the "new york pride"/arrogance, something that annoys me that i often fall victim to having at times. It's "I live in New York. Therefore I'm cooler than you. Can you see up my nose yet?" Some people are genuinely kind and helpful though, to be fair. Getting offtrack though. i often call someone to mapquest something for me and it's easy as pie.

2) Cell phones also help when you need to pretend to be on the phone. I have used this on many occasions such as:

a) walking outside in certain areas, it is likely that i will pass by crazy, shifty, scary, or slimy people. i often pull out my cell phone and make a pretend phone call (or call sean, my back-up for getting out of a sticky situation) so i can appear nonchalant or not have to hear any slimy things a slimy person might say to me, or anything else that might be offensive. Trust me, it happens, and it happens often.

b) when the UPS man comes. Many of you may be aware of the long-standing relationship i have had with the UPS man. Many times he has said questionnable things to me regarding my marital status. He would say things (not particularly offensive) that would make me believe he thought i was single, even though i repeatedly waved my wedding ring'ed finger in his face, and the name on many of the packges he delivered said "sean and jennifer". Also, the fact that i would bring up "Sean..my husband.." This is not a joke. This guy was dense as...something dense. He would STILL say weird things. Now, i cannot hide from him. He is still my UPS guy. Therefore, when he rings the bell to deliver a package, i get on a pretend phone call so as to keep any and all conversation to a minimum and it allows me to get away quickly.

3) Though this may seem obvious, cell phones also help you to not look like a loser. Whenever you're somewhere, and people have friends with them or something to read, and you don't, you can whip out the cell phone and text message someone or mess around with the notebook or something to make it look like you're too busy for friends.


LUCKY: here are some reasons why not having a cell phone makes you lucky.

1) you still have social skills. It's a communication device yet i swear, having a cell phone makes you a little bit socially retarded. you lose some skills. Instead of talking to your friendly neighbor whilst standing in line somewhere, you pull out your cell phone and call someone else. Therefore, in real-life situations where you're to talk to someone face-to-face, suddenly you become awkward and say something weird and embarrassing. Also, to go along with this, having a cell phone puts up barriers between people. People don't talk to each other anymore, so we live in an even more isolated world.

2) People can't find you. If you're anti-social like me and hate talking on the phone, then you can leave your house and not be contacted and people will just have to leave a message on your voicemail at home which you can check whenever you get back and do whatever you want. One might argue you can do this with your cell phone, but i find that i feel a little bit guilty when I'm out and about and i don't answer the phone. I know it's dumb but i do. I'd much rather be able to say I didn't get the call until hours later when i got home on my home answering machine. OR, i'd rather people knew i had no choice, that i didn't have a cell phone, so they know i'm out and truly can't be contacted. Unless i'm not out and i'm screening calls at home. So really this can go either way. Still, it doesn't change the fact that i don't like talking on the phone.

3) It keeps things simple. I cannot deny that i often wish for a simpler life. I feel an urge somewhere inside me to throw away all my crap and go live with a tribe in Africa. Plus, what if cell phones cause brain tumors? You never know. We may find out down the road.

SO. What are your thoughts on all this? Are you glad to be lucky or a loser? Do you wish you were lucky or that you were a loser? Are you a loser but not by choice? Do i even know what i'm talking about anymore??

Anyway, thoughts?