Fruit

Fruit, one of the great loves of my life. I have really intense feelings for fruit, and I don't think it's just the scurvy talking. I LOVE FRUIT. And I need it. You might say I'm addicted to it. Or just physically dependent. If i don't have fruit every day I will begin going a little bit insane. Only when i eat some fruit do i go back to being sane, unless something else makes me insane. Then, sadly, consuming fruit does nothing. (this is the stupidest paragraph i've ever written) Here are some fruity thoughts i have:

I am going to invent a new banana tree (bananas don't actually grow on trees) that produces clusters of bananas that ripen at different intervals. Because i'm so particular regarding the appropriate level of ripeness and therefore edibility of bananas--I love them-- but this means i have to eat them ALL basically at the same time. And do i want to do that? Well, sometimes. But most times not. And i don't like feeling pressured to either. I always have to have an eagle eye on them and be ready to strike when the time is right. I'll wake up one morning and the banana timer of edibility has begun and will ring i don't know when but soon, and when it does, it's banana muffin city for them. I could lower my standards of when a banana is ready to be eaten but i won't lower my standards for anyone, not even for bananas. So, stay tuned for that.

Strawberries are delicious. But one might feel anxiety about them since you like to eat them but then you're left with the green leafy part and you don't know what to do with it. One time I witnessed Sean just pop the whole thing in his mouth. Appalled, I asked did he really just do what i thought i saw him do?? And he said, "what, now i don't have the leafy part. And it's like a salad!" A fan of strawberries in salads, and not having to deal with leftover leafy things, I gave it a go. It is wonderfully liberating. You should try it. I don't always eat the whole thing but sometimes i do.

Green apples used to be gross to me. I thought they were too tart but now I like it. Also, they're the truest apple friend all the year through. And for that I am grateful. Because all the others are suckville until the fall.

Kiwis are tasty and difficult. Perhaps this is due to my inability to properly shell them from their fuzzy casing, but i feel like you do a lot of messy work for a small bit of sweet green reward. I'm on the fence.

I love a giant, fresh raspberry. There aren't many foods more delicious, i think. And sometimes, to make it last, i eat them one little seed pocket at a time.

I love almost all fruits. But not quite all, especially fruits that lie to my face. Nobody likes a liar, particularly a gross liar, and this means YOU, papayuck.